Let's Talk Luggage

When I'm the bachelor, this is how the first episode is going down. Forget the limos. Forget the opening cocktail party. Forget the first rose ceremony. I'm going to say to Chris Harrison "keep the girls out of site and bring in the luggage."
Pink molded plastic? Gone.
Zebra pattern? Gone.
Some Louis Vuitton number? Sorry.
For drama maybe they'd let me throw them in the Pacific.
Show me an outdoorsy backpacky number and I'll tell Chris Harrison to book a hometown date right then and there. Don't even need to see the girl.
Don't underestimate the power of luggage. Watch what comes rolling out of those rooms over the next few weeks and you'll understand what I mean.